Monday, July 16, 2012

Serve It Up

Waiting to move is taking a little toll on the Marital Contentment Dial. There's an issue under every cuppa Joe.  Roofers and plumbers and estimates, and decisions and, and, and... such a wellspring of male vs female conflict over nearly ever matter.

No wonder, then, why this was today's first click at the INbox.

MiddleChild swooped in to make sure I actually cooked with the wine, and not visa-versa

Edited down. for the full treatment.

July 16, 2012
15 Things Wives Should Stop Doing
by Mary May Larmoyeux

"In the 1960s, The Supremes recorded their hit song “Stop! In the Name of Love!”

Can you identify?

I asked some girlfriends, “What should a wife stop doing if she wants to improve her marriage?” This list is based on their responses.

1. Stop thinking that your way is the “right” way.
2. Don’t put others before your husband. 
3. Don’t expect your husband to be your girlfriend.
4. Don’t dishonor your husband. Suggestions included: Stop all nagging and don’t correct hubby in front of others. If you finish your husband’s sentences, you may be unintentionally communicating, “I don’t really care about what you have to say.”
5. Stop expecting your husband to fail you as your dad failed your mom. 
6. Don’t put your husband on the defensive.
7. Never use sex to bargain with your husband.
8. Stop reminding your husband about things over and over. 

*** ding ding ding ***
9. Don’t make your husband earn your respect.  Many women think, I’ll respect him when he earns it. But there’s a reason that Ephesians 5:33 says, “Let the wife see that she respects her husband.”  As one friend said: “If women could learn to understand that respect is a man's native tongue, that it absolutely heals his heart and ministers to him like nothing else, it would make the biggest difference in the world.”
*** ding ding ding ***
- - Edit this to item #1 - - 

10. Stop giving your husband your long term to-do list.
11. Don’t act like your spouse is a mind reader.
12. Stop putting housework ahead of hubby. One young mom told her husband that she didn't want to make love one night because she had just changed the sheets and she wanted them to stay clean. What do you think that response said to her husband? Another woman, who puts her husband ahead of the housework, said: “Do not leave the unfolded laundry on your marriage bed.
13. Put an end to taking the lead because you think he won't take it. “The first many years of our marriage,” one wife said, “I would see what needed to be done and get frustrated that my husband would not take charge and get it done.” She went on to say that she’s changed by learning to wait on her husband’s leadership. “I really believe,” she says, “that our men don't lead because we women are too quick to jump in and take care of it all.”
Ephesians 5:23 says, “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body … .”
14. Do not expect your husband to be Prince Charming.
15. Never look first to a book, a plan, or a person to fix a problem in your marriage.Instead go to God’s Word and believe and act on the things that He says. “He will lead me to any resources I need,” one woman said. “God has already given us everything we need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3) but we have to live according to the promises and expect Him to show up for us.”

A question
The Bible paraphrase The Message, says in 1 Corinthians 13, “Love never gives up … isn’t always ‘me first,’ … doesn’t keep score of the sins of others … trusts God always, always looks for the best.”

What do your words and actions say to your sweetheart about your love? Do you need to stop doing something in your marriage?
Before you answer,

'think it o-o-ver.' "

I LISTEN every morn'g, 8:30AM,  99.5 FM

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